friday, september 25

30-2

this weekend i will tiptoe into a new decade of my life.  the one that begins with a "3."  i wasn't going to write about it but i thought what the heck, it's going to happen whether you write about it or not so why not document how you feel transitioning into a new decade.  truthfully, i feel good about it.  if anyone tells you they feel great about turning 30 they are lying straight to your face so i think good is an accurate and honest description of my feelings.  

there is something that i carry into my thirties that i don't remember ever carrying into a previous decade of my life…confidence.  oddly enough, i like who i am.  i may not be the perfect height or have the perfect skin or be the perfect weight or be the "best" at everything but i.don't.care.  i am thrilled with the things that i do have.  

i have a husband that loves my gray hairs that wisp from my forehead.  i have cellulite.  i have a daughter that is the light of my life who smiles every time she sees me.  i have scars on my face as a reminder of teenage acne.  i have really awesome pointed toes.  i have an amazingly supportive family.  i have tons of little red dots all over my body called cherry angiomas that continue to pop up at an astonishing rate.  i have kick ass friends.  i have a husband whom i adore and adores me back.  i will have rock hard abs (give me a few more weeks).  i have will-power beyond belief.  i have little brown flecks in my big green eyes.

i have a lot and i love everything i have.

i would be lying if i didn't say there is trepidation for what this year has in store for me and our family.  choices need to be made about where to live, the anxiety about moving again, the unknown in the healing i still have to do.  but walking alongside the trepidation is much excitement.  i am thrilled that we are inching closer to placing our roots as a family…to be somewhere that we feel is best for us.  to have a choice in the matter.  to travel to places we have never been before.

i have big goals for myself in the upcoming year as well.  to set into motion things i have dreamt of.  to finally "do" instead of just sitting idly on the sidelines and watching everyone one else thinking "i totally could have done that."  

this…all of this is what confidence will get you.  and i hope that adali can read this one day and be proud of her mama.  be proud of everything i was and everything i did and carry the same confidence that i now carry.  i just hope she carries it much sooner than i did.

much love,

mama a

ps…a big thank you to my mom for without you i would have never become the confident young woman i am today.  

now i must return to my duties as a mama to a sick bebe.  yes, she is sick yet again. 

14 Comments ( Reply )

  1. Sara T says:

    Happy Birthday Jamie!! Great post!! Much luck to you in the upcoming year!
    (LOVE the picture of you! -it’s awesome)

    Laughed when I read the story of xe!

    Signed – your younger friend…. the one who is still in her 20′s…..

    (you know I couldn’t have signed this any other way…right?!?) :-)

  2. Jenna says:

    I loved this post. I hope you have a wonderful birthday.

  3. I, too, loved this post! Beautifully written. And I share SO many of the same feelings. I’m only a couple of years ahead of you, but I’ve thought the same thing over the last few years about confidence. It feels so good to finally know who I am, what I grew up to be, and being totally comfortable with all of it.

    Happy birthday, and welcome to your thirties! Trust me…it’s not so bad.

  4. Vicky says:

    Happy Birthday. Loved your post.

  5. Sonya says:

    Happy Birthday Jamie! Have a wonderful weekend. So, what day is the actual big day? I didn’t know that we have a birthday so close together or possibly the same day?!?

    I agree with you, in your post, and Nicole. I have really enjoyed my 30′s thus far and the confidence is definitely higher than it ever has been. Enjoy your birthday weekend!

  6. Mary says:

    Happy Brithday Jamie!! Great post, I turned 30 in April, and had many of the same feelings. Good luck with all your plans for the future. It sounds like some wonderful changes are coming to the Antisdel family.

  7. sweeney says:

    wow. i only WISH i was as confident as you are…hopefully by the time i’m 30 i will learn to love myself as you do. and learn to love the place i’m at in life as you do. i’m obviously not there yet, and feel like i’ll never be there. but there’s light at the end of the tunnel – you are a shining example!

    this post, the person who wrote it, is truly someone to be admired and looked up. i know adali will appreciate this post, and all the other great posts you’ve completed and will complete in the future.

    congratulations on your 3rd decade of life. i wish you 6 more, greater and even more fantastic decades!

    happy 30th birthday!

    xoxo
    chelle

    ps i gotta know what jastin gets you! he’s a great gift giver so i’m wondering what’s going to top that AWESOME bike!!?? :)

  8. Micala says:

    Happy 30th Birthday Jamie!

  9. Jennifer Teegarden MD says:

    Jamie,

    Happy Birthday! When I turned 30, I was dreading it, as I think most women do. That being said, last year when I turned 31, I enjoyed it. I have a real sense of peace of who I am as a person, and like yourself, feel very confident in who that person is. I would not choose to be in my 20′s again, if that were ever an option. My 20s were great, but my 30s have been better. Wishing you a wonderful year ahead, full of many laughs and great memories! Have fun celebrating!

    Jennifer

  10. Erin Geary says:

    Oh, Jamie, I wish you could see yourself as the world saw you – as I see you. You are stunningly beautiful, good at anything you try, accomplished, and one hell of a mother! You inspire, motivate, and change the lives of people you’ve never met…had I not watched you raise money for March of Dimes, I would have never dreamed of trying to raise money for Avery’s charity (and thanks to YOUR inspiration, DG received over $3,200!). You SHOULD have confidence, especially if you knew how many girls (myself included) are intimidated by the dynamic package that is Jamie Schwerman Antisdel. Have a fantastic 30th birthday. You definitely have reason to celebrate yourself!

  11. Melissa says:

    Happy Belated Birthday! I do have to say, while I had a moment of trepidation before my 30th, it didn’t last long and so far, my 30s have been great! Enjoy them – sounds like you will!

  12. Tiffany says:

    Happy Birthday Jamie!

  13. Nicole says:

    Happy 30th! Great post, you have so much to celebrate!

  14. Elizabeth LeBlanc says:

    Happy Birthday Jamie!

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